Bizarre experimental cookery take 2

I've just finished cleaning the BBQ and replacing the lava rocks. I thought I'd try a quick naan bread on it (I'm an addict - is there such a thing as nanaholics anonymous ?)...

Tastes good, texture good - cooking time a bit variable though - requires more experimentation I think - or possibly rearrangement of the lava rocks.

Berwickshire News June 29th

Taxpayers will end up footing rail link bill thunders the front page of this weeks Berwickshire News. A new political party, the Borders Party, has been set up seemingly with the major aim of derailing the return of rail travel to the Borders on the grounds that it will only assist in the Galashiels area becoming ever more attractive to Edinburgh commuters. Eyemouth is hailed as the most English-friendly town in Scotland because of its tolerance during the current FIFA World Cup (in Germany, Scotland failed to qualify - again) with St. George's Crosses, Saltires and Union Jacks (they mean Union Flags of course) all flying side by side in the town. Several small schools in the Borders have all been blessed with the recommendation to remain open. SBC will of course revisit all decisions in due course as part of an ongoing review process.

23 drivers were nabbed for speeding in the Borders during a police crackdown on Friday last and a further 11 nabbed for flouting seatbelt laws. In the Lothian & Borders area a total of 79 were caught - of which 45 were van drivers, and 51 were speeding.

According to an article on page 2, SBC have come to the conclusion that climate change is something that will affect the Borders - having both positives and negatives for council coffers - a positive cited is the reduction in winter road gritting, a negative being the rise in mosquitoes! Nice to see that it's all being kept firmly in perspective.

Paddy Tompkins QPM, Chief Constable of Lothian & Borders Police has called upon those attending the multitude of civic weeks, Braw Lads' Gaitherins and other such festivals not to overpartake in alcoholic beverages. LBP are adopting a high profile presence at such festivals and the potentially inebriated should take heed.

Scottish Power are using a brand spanking new German machine to lay underground cables between a new windfarm (locally unwelcome I'm sure) and the national electricity grid - according to the report it can plough the furrow, lay the cables underground and replace the ground at a walking pace. Euan Robson MSP never one to shirk a photo-op or a vox-pop-op was reportedly impressed by what he saw of the device in action.

'Dogbombs' - the scourge of Greenlaw - are also a hot topic iat the Gavinton, Fogo & Polwarth Community council, the situation hasn't reached the letters page (perhaps it has - but I haven't reached it yet either).

A snippet from Torness Nuclear Power Station - After carrying out some speed testing on two gas circulators during the statutory outage, they were found to be technically lacking so have been replaced by refurbished units.

Over at Duns Sheriff Court, more justice meted out to those that have stepped over the thin blue line - Some imposter sitting in Sheriff K's chair going by the moniker of Alan Miller but dishing out punishment nonetheless. An Eyemouth man put on probation for 9 months for smashing a bottle over another Eyemouth man's head (good to know it's the most English-friendly town eh?). A Swinton man disqualified for 12months and relieved of £275 for driving whilst under the influence on the morning after the night before. A Duns woman guilty of claiming just shy of £2000 in benefits fraudulently fined £340. A man currently living in Coldstream found guilty of indecent behaviour in the Eyemouth area some years ago - Sheriff Al slapped him on the Sex Offenders Register pending sentencing following social reports. A man with learning difficulties ordered to pay £300 in compensation and a £60 for slashing tyres on two cars - claimed that he'd been intimidated into committing the crime. An Eyemouth man (it's that friendly town again) ordered to pay £250 in compensation and an £80 for throwing a part-brick through a window after an argument, and finally a Coldstream man banned for 18 months and fined £100 following a 3rd conviction for driving without insurance - same guy also got stung with a further £180 fine for carrying an offensive weapon.

A snippet from Berwickshire District Court - An Eyemouth woman found guilty of breach of the peace and vandalism after she "conducted herself in a disorderly manner, forcibly entered a parked motorhome, placed sleeping persons therein in a state of fear and alarm and committed a breach of the peace" and "did, wilfully or recklessly tear the curtains in the motorhome and break a ladder catch.". Fined a total of £250 and ordered to pay £165 in compensation.

Cllr David Parker, erstwhile leader of SBC is upset by a claim from the SBC opposition leader that SBC is the least improved local authority in Scotland. From the dealings that the Paperboy has had with SBC to date, it appears that there is plenty of room for that improvement to take place, but talking to other residents the situation has been ongoing for a considerable time and no improvement is likely in the short term. Part of Cllr Parker's defence is that when all performance indicators are taken into account SBC rises to 13th (out of 32) - still plenty of room for improvement then (or is the Paperboy just being silly?).

Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website

PS. Germany beat Argentina on penalties after a 1-1 draw (aet) despite the best efforts of the Argentine players to feign injury and attack by the Germans in the Thierry Henry style (ie. where someone taps your knee and you grab your nose in pain). Paperboy happy at this outcome.

An observation on a previous story

Previously I mentioned that a Coldstream publican had claimed 40% of his drinkers were being whisked away over the Border to enjoy a smoke-accompanied pint - today whilst picking up my copy of the Berwickshire News I spotted a notice in his pub window for a property for sale with planning permission to convert to residential. The address of the property in question appeared to be that of the pub. Curious.

Berwickshire News June 22nd

The sad decision to close Coldstream (and Jedburgh) cottage hospitals screams from the top of the front page. Much of the article is taken up picking over the possible uses for the site and a defence of the care and facilities that will be available at other facilities in Kelso and Duns cottage hospitals. A smaller article reports that the Scottish Health Council is urging NHS Borders to attempt to rebuild the bridges that their hostile action have destroyed. Also a toddler absconded from a previously well respected nursery in Eyemouth. He was returned safe and well after his incredulous mother spotted him in the company of strangers 60 yards up the road. Members of staff have been dismissed as they didn't know he was missing and weren't apparently too concerned when he was returned.

There's a Council Tax demand served on 5 migrant workers in Duns - they'd previously been assured by their landlord that their rent covered it. A clear case for the SBC officer mentioned last week, except no appointment has been made. Funding for rural buses is inadequate according to Euan Robson MSP for Berwickshire and Roxburgh - he hails the increase in frequency of the X95 service from Carlisle to Edinburgh via Hawick but bemoans the fact that they're using regular urban service buses for the route (which is approximately 100 miles in length). He implores the Scottish Transport minister to put some cash up to transform the rural bus network.

The Waverley Rail project is fraught with risks according to the leading article on page 3 - the bill to allow the restoration of the rail link between Tweedbank and Edinburgh was passed only last week by 114 votes to 1 in Holyrood and already the doom-merchants are circling. More on the anger and sadness felt by the campaigners who sadly lost their fight to keep Coldstream Cottage Hospital open - many feeling as the PaperBoy does that the decision was made months ago and that everything that happened since has been a sham.

The James Hutton Trail, which follows in the footsteps of the 18th century Berwickshire farmer regarded by many as father of modern geology, is highlighted as attracting international interest in the first month since it opened. It doesn't mention how international - so it might just be some daytrippers from Berwick.....

Amey Highways hits the news with the exciting revelation that it's a 24 hour a day operation to maintain the A1. It's not just the roadworks with which we're all too familiar - but safety schemes, signage, drainage, lighting, litter picking (on certain stretches) and other unspecified general routine maintenance.

Over at Sheriff Drummond's courthouse a fleet of drivers are in his sights this week - a Coldstream man banned for 9 months for moving an uninsured vehicle, which was also defective, which he'd just taken ownership having an accident and being uninsured during the process. Also relieved of £300. A painter and decorator from Coldingham reversed into the same fence twice on separate occasions - Sherriff K listened to the pleas of counsel that the guilty party had repaired the fence and had painted it all. Awarded 5 points which took him over the 12 point limit but has pleaded to go to a special hearing to be able to keep his licence claiming undue hardship and suffering. A Berwick builder was fined £300 and banned for 18 months for drink driving in Eyemouth. A 'senile delinquent' from Selkirk was fined £325 and had 6 points awarded for driving with no MOT or insurance. On the non-driving front a Duns woman was fined £200 for contempt of court after a performance where she was pleading not guilty to a charge, witnesses were called from all over the country only for her to change her plea to guilty. Sheriff K opined "the conduct shown to the court and witnesses was nothing short of disgraceful".

Old timers in Kelso will be able to get their Zimmer™ frames and walking sticks MOTed on Tuesday 27th when a special event is held in the Market Square. Also part of the event is some advice on avoiding trip hazards - those that know Kelso at all will realise the humour in this - most of Kelso is cobbled, whilst they aren't particularly uneven, they do represent exactly the kind of trip hazard that the target audience should be seeking to avoid.

Farm Focus tells of the woes of the wool market - farmers get 45p per kilogram of fleece (provided it's in top condition) of which 27p is taken up in handling fees at the British Wool Marketing Board - given an average fleece in the area is something like 3kg there is not a lot of money left after the shearing costs are taken into account. More ridiculous are the deductions that can be made for incorrectly rolled fleeces, dirty fleeces, contamination by twigs or twine - it's perfectly possible that a fleece could end up with a negative value! British eggs are the safest in the EU acording to a recent EU survey - something that the Scottish NFU is keen to bring to everyone's attention. The PaperBoy mainly buys local eggs from Oxenrig farm - can't get much more local than that!


Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website

Cottage Hospital Closure Timetable Discussions

BBC News reports that NHS Borders wants to close the cottage hospitals by the end of October, redeploying the affected staff. Seems like it's being carried out in undue haste to the PaperBoy.

Cottage Hospitals fight to continue

The BBC News website reports that a legal challenge to the decision to close Jedburgh Cottage Hospital is likely. Given that it was closed as part of the same operation that closed Coldstream Cottage Hospital it seems likely that the review would include the decision to close that too.

The review request revolves around the veracity of the figures produced by NHS Borders that 15% of Cottage Hospital beds are in the Borders where only 2% of the population lives.

Berwickshire News June 15th

Slightly late with the News today - tied up with a steady stream of visitors in connection with the missive from SBC yesterday and my information gathering for the Community Council.

This week's front page carries the stories that SBC have appointed a support officer for migrant workers, to make it easier for them and their families to settle. Presumably that doesn't extend to giving them egg-sucking lessons in writing their addresses correctly that appear to be reserved for non-migrants. SBC workers have broadly accepted the compensation offers to settle their sex discrimination case against SBC for those female workers who are not paid bonuses where their male counterparts on similar scales but doing different jobs are eligible. Eyemouth beach fails to meet EU standards for bathing water - it's one of only three designated bathing beaches in Scotland that have failed. Finally the Act of Parliament promoting the reinstatement of the rail link from Edinburgh to Tweedbank has been passed by margin of 114 to 1.

Developers apparently are facing a £10,000 levy for the effects that their developments have on needs for education, roads, sport & leisure and enviromental improvement. They may also be asked to contribute to the provision of health facilities. No mention of the farce of SBC naming streets in a confusing fashion though ;-)

Rather confusingly (following last week's radio mention that Duns Sheriff court was having a fortnight off) at Duns Sheriff Court we have an Eyemouth man sent down for 3 years and 7 months for a stabbing. An elderly Coldstream gent slapped with £125 and 5 points for hitting a parked car in Duke Street and then reversing off with a view to returning. Police attending felt that he had taken too long to make himself known. A Birgham man grassed up for drink driving at over twice the legal limit, disqualified for four years and relieved of £265. An Eyemouth youth found guilty of stealing his father's credit card. St. Kevin told the youth he was lucky not to be facing a stretch of porridge and added a £350 fine to register his displeasure. Another Eyemouth youth pleaded by letter after an incident involving a bottle of booze being confiscated from him by Police officers and poured down a drain. He became agitated and started to swear at the officers - he then became more aggressive and started to push the officers, one of whom sustained a grazed knee and clearly took a dim view. So did Sheriff Drummond as he applied a £100 fine. Sentence deferred on a Coldstream drinkdriver - his 4th such offence in 13 years. Sheriff Drummond ruled that social enquiry reports needed to be carried out before sentencing.

On the letters page, Digital TV switchover continues to attract attention - although in this case it's being used as a stooge to get the "Berwickshire - the district that SBC forgot" storyline resurrected. The author of the letter expresses no surprise that Berwickshire didn't appear on the list as it is frequently overlooked for other things like Berwick phone numbers no longer being in the Borders phone book, and of course the fiasco of the new refuse/recycling arrangements.

More Borders smokers are trying to quit since the recent ban on smoking in enclosed public spaces - figures show that in 2005, a total of 2000 people tried via NHS Borders - for the first three months of 2006 the figure is 1500.

Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website

I fear that we have awakened a sleeping giant and filled him with a terrible resolve

Powerful words, allegedly spoken by Admiral Yamamoto after the bombing of Pearl Harbor in December 1941.

Following up on yesterday's letter, I called it's author at SBC to discuss some points. After a protracted conversation I was left no further forward in getting to the bottom of the issue. The end of the conversation was a suggestion to get in touch with the Community Council - via a non-existent noticeboard.

After some considerable digging I unearthed a contact for Community Engagement at SBC. I contacted her and was offered an incorrect email address. After yet more digging I located the correct email address for the Community Council chairman and sent him an email enquiring where and when the next Community Council meeting was to take place and that the process was to get an item on the agenda.

Within 30 minutes a response was forthcoming with an invitation to call him to discuss why I wanted to speak to the assembled council. I called. Some 45 minutes later, after outlining the letter and my response to it, I got off the phone with an action step to canvas my neighbours in East & West Mews.

I constructed a quick note to the neighbours and delivered it (at the time of writing) 4 hours ago. So far out of 21 leaflets sent, I've had representations from 6. All in the same boat as me to a greater or lesser extent. Three of them have already responded to the SBC author, many in very similar terms to my own letter, two of the others have decided that as they are now "not alone" that they too are going to respond to the SBC author.

The man at SBC, I fear, does not know what he has ignited here - feelings are running high and he is the current target of venomous words from otherwise peaceable citizens. I'm looking forward to the response to my missive that should land on his desk on Friday morning.

A condescending communication from SBC

I arrived home today to be greeted by a letter from Scottish Borders Council. The letter is addressed to all residents of my and the next street.

In it an officer of SBC writes (in the style of a teacher admonishing an errant child) that we are all upsetting some residents of another nearby street with a similar name by not giving our addresses correctly. His implied conjecture is that we are doing this on purpose by wilfully giving our addresses in an ambiguous format.

Several things about this letter have annoyed me.... The content implies that only the residents of the nearby street are affected. This is far from the truth. The fact that we as residents are responsible for the situation and we are required to make changes. There is no similar call for those in the nearby street to show some understanding and community spirit in directing the misguided drivers etc to the right destinations.

The tone of this letter from SBC has prompted me to write a substantial letter in reply pointing out that not one of these problems actually has a root cause with the residents that are now being vilified by the council and suggesting some ways forward to improve the situation.

The highlights of my response are these:

Our street is currently called "East Mews Acacia Avenue" (not really - names changed to protect the innocent) the next one is called "West Mews Acacia Avenue", although it was "Acacia Avenue East Mews" when we moved in and SBC changed it without telling us about 3 months later. Cue another round of address changing shenanigans. The other affected street being "Acacia Avenue".

Some buffoon somewhere decided that it was a super idea to incorporate an existing street name into two new streets - it should be noted that the streets were not named by their residents, but by an element of SBC apparently acting on the suggestion of the community council. I seek clarification of who took the decision, who was present and what part they all played in the process. Of course this makes every wrong address the fault of the residents of East & West Mews.

Address format - Most companies will now ask for a postcode and a house number. They will then automatically fill the address information from the Royal Mail Postcode Address File (PAF). They then do not allow editing of that pre-filled address – it comes from the PAF, therefore as far as the company is concerned it is correct. Depending on the version of the PAF in use in our case it's either "East Mews Acacia Avenue" or "Acacia Avenue East Mews" - even so when it's correct it runs to 27 characters without the house number - Royal Mail's maximum in the defined format for the PAF is 30, other systems in use that I know of are as low as 23. So any misguided deliveries are naturally entirely the fault of the residents of East & West Mews!

Utility companies – Without exception I provided both gas and electricity companies with the supply point identification number, which according to OFGEM pinpoints a supply regardless of any address on record. Despite this both Scottish Power and Scottish Gas managed to change the account for the corresponding house in Acacia Avenue. My fault of course!

Deliveries - Since the first day I took possession of the property, Royal Mail’s delivery staff have, with one exception, found the right letterbox into which to deliver mail. The error in that case was confusion between East & West Mews whilst 1 West Mews was still under construction. Courier Companies are much more problematic, they continue to attempt to deliver packages to “Acacia Avenue” even when the address on the package contains terms like “next door to 39 Acacia Avenue” in addition to the correct address. As a resident, I have little control over the apparent inability of the delivery driver to read the address. On one occasion I’ve been forced to drive halfway across the country to retrieve a package because it’s been refused by the resident of Acacia Avenue, with no good grace to point the driver 500 yards down the road. When I get an occasional enquiry from a courier seeking an address I do my best to help because I know what a pain it is to have to drive 60+ miles round trip to pick up from the "local" depot (at least one of courier's depots is 164 miles round trip along winding country roads - allow 2h each way if traffic is light, add 20 litres of fuel at 98.9p/litre locally). Not to worry - it's all my fault, nothing to do with the resident of Acacia Avenue getting an occasional knock on the door because the delivery driver can't or won't read the address on the package, and I'm not inconvenienced at all by a 4h round trip costing me £20 to pick up a package that she refused to direct 500 yards. She's upset, I'm fuming having wasted four hours and spent £20 unnecessarily.

Tradespeople – I noted with some amusement at the time my stair carpet was delivered that the fitter had been to the right house number in “Acacia Avenue” which is a bungalow, and one would naturally assume not usually equipped with a staircase requiring carpeting. Again he had the full correct address and his additional notes said “next door to 39 Acacia Avenue”. That's right - my fault - my omniscience didn't run to knowing that a carpet fitter wouldn't try to fit a stair carpet to a bungalow!

The letter that has provoked me runs to 4 paragraphs - my response is 6 pages. It appears that this officer of the SBC is in for some unexpected 'light reading' on Friday morning when the letter arrives at Council HQ.

What chance of any success in getting a response? Personally I think the chance of a satisfactory response is almost nil, although I shall persist in writing until such time as I get a satisfactory response, assuming SBC don't change the name of the street again of course!

Official: Cottage Hospitals to close

In a body blow to the communities of Coldstream and Jedburgh the Scottish Health Minister Andy Kerr has approved the plans by NHS Borders to close both Cottage Hospitals.

Berwickshire News June 8th

The front page headline in this week's News is that two sets plans for a care home in Coldstream came before the council this week. One was rejected outright because it was proposed to use land earmarked for light industrial use, a decision on the other proposal on Kelso Road just outside the settlement boundary deferred.

Planning applications for the new high schools in Duns & Eyemouth have run into problems - In Eyemouth it revolves around the non-treatment of surface water runoff before it's discharged into the Eye Water, connection to the water & drainage mains
and also objections from local residents about the service access. In Duns surface water is again an issue, the SBC director of planning doesn't regard the location as ideal for a landmark building because it's low lying, ground problems, flood risk, loss of wetland habitat and biodiversity. Berwickshire Civic Society object on the grounds that the new school will detract from the old one which is a listed building.

Digital TV coverage maps have varying degrees of accuracy states another front pager - the early versions of the leaflet produced by Digital UK that were placed in libraries have been replaced. The Paper Boy has recently thought of another way of detecting if readers will be affected - on an analogue ITV1 if you switch to teletext and press the "Reveal" button it will tell you which main transmitter you get your signal from via a 3 letter code. If it reads "SEL" you're affected and will be switching over in 2008. Of course if you view ITV1 at 6pm and you're greeted from Carlisle that's another giveaway......

The introduction by SBC of charges for School Minibus use attracts some attention and criticism on the inside page - the new charges amount to £30 for a half-day or £50 for a full-day - the old charge was 30p per mile. Previously there were 14 buses - soon there will be 9. All this to save £85000 on the education budget. A teaching union spokesperson claimed that it was not the case that school trips may be cancelled in future - it is already happening. Perhaps they should have tapped the stars of the next story for the £85k....

The Duke & Duchess of Rothesay (aka Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall everywhere else in the world bar Scotland) visited Borders General Hospital to open a new scanner and to attend a Prince's Trust Anniversary event. A large number of dignitaries managed to attend the events at BGH or the evening do, leaving the Paper Boy wondering what these dignitaries do when they're not meeting the Duke & Duchess, because it's obviously not important that it can be ignored for the day. There is no mention of what the visit cost to stage, but the Paper Boy suspects it would go a long way to funding the school trip minibuses for the year....

The nets at Paxton House fishing station have been blessed - what impact that has on the function of the nets is unclear, but the rowing boat and oars pictured could do with a lick of paint.

A Duns-based SSPCA inspector was one of three SSPCA inspectors honoured by the organisation with a national award for services to animal welfare.

Over at Sheriff Kevin's hothouse courthouse (see previous post, heating malfunction not mentioned in the Berwickshire) a Portuguese man who gave an Oxford address pleaded guilty to a charge of indecent assault and two breaches of the peace in Galashiels over the space of 3 months in 2004. Sentence was deferred to June 26th and he was remanded in custody. A Leamington Spa man appeared before Sheriff K after pulling out to overtake a lorry on the A1 into the path of an oncoming police car on a bend, whilst claiming to be unsighted by the sun. Sheriff Drummond opined that the accused's driving fell far short of the minimum standards expected of drivers and that it posed a hazard to reasonable drivers, so relieved him of £400, his driving licence for 12 months and ordered him to sit an extended driving test at the end of the disqualification. A Clydebank man with a history of violence remanded in custody for committing a breach of the peace, obstructing the police & criminal damage in Galashiels. The Sheriff said "the combination of young men, alcohol, violence and knives causes big problems". Sentence deferred until he appears at Selkirk in connection with other matters on July 5th. A Grantshouse youth mentioned previously appeared in person after his previous guilty plea by letter on the charge of wasting Police time. Sheriff Drummond told the lad "there needs to be some recompense for the public purse, £475 of Police time was wasted". The case was passed to the Children's Panel for them to determine the scale of recompense. He will appear on June 12th. A Duns woman was summoned to appear in person after pleading guilty by letter to 4 charges of assault on two minors. She will appear on June 28th.

On the letters page, the colour of the Saltires flying at Lamberton on the A1 continues to attract attention - a correspondent informs the readership that there are in fact two variants of any Pantone® colour, coated and uncoated - depending upon what the colour is printed. He goes on to add that colour can be, and is measured & defined numerically - which eliminates the "too dark", "too lemony" type of argument.

A "Marilyn Munroe" film was the theme for Berwick & District Floral Art Club - when the Paper Boy checked for the output of Ms Munroe and could find nothing other than a "Marilyn Munro" who worked as a production manager on the Tigger Movie or a more widely known "Marilyn Monroe". The leading competitor for typo of the week I think that one.

Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website

The Heat is On

On my home from a meeting in Edinburgh, I caught the "News for the Borders" on BBC Radio Scotland (you can listen to the latest version here updated twice daily (weekdays), RealPlayer required) and there was a non-judicial mention of St. Kevin of Duns. "Temperatures soared at Duns Sheriff Court" - On one of the hottest days of the year so far (low to mid 20s celsius, 70s fahrenheit) the central heating at Duns Sheriff Court was stuck in the 'full on' position.

When a court usher was dispatched to investigate, he found that the heating was controlled remotely from Edinburgh and couldn't be switched off or turned down. Oor Kevin branded it a disgrace especially as the court is often nippy in the depths of winter. Knobs will be twiddled ahead of the next sitting in a fortnight, or no doubt the knob operative in Edinburgh will receive a stiff memo. "A bit hot under the collar there" the newsreader quipped after reading the story with a total lack of comedic timing - obviously been preparing the quip for hours.

Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website

Scottish Smoking Ban Effects raised in Holyrood

A story on the BBC News website that the local Roxburgh & Berwickshire MSP has raised concerns expressed by businesses that with the smoking ban in England not coming into effect until next year that smokers are crossing the border to take advantage of the difference.

First Minister Jack McConnell suggested in response that non-smokers from England (he probably said "outwith Scotland" though) may well be doing the opposite and that the number of non-smokers and wannabe-quitters outweighs the number of smokers.

Berwickshire News June 1st

This week's Berwickshire News front page carries the story that the petition to keep Coldstream Cottage Hospital open is to be delivered to Scottish Health Minister Andy Kerr tomorrow (Friday 2nd June). A slight confusion creeps in at the end of the article where it states "The petition was delivered to the petitions committee of the Scottish Parliament in time for its visit to the Borders" which is due to take place in the glamorous venue of Jedburgh Town Hall on June 26th.

The Italian Job apparently came to Eyemouth on Sunday last - no sign of Michael Caine nor any 'bloody doors' blown off though - just 140 Minis (it's not mentioned if they mean proper Issigonis-designed examples, or the new-fangled BMW-produced type) on the "Mini Clan Thistle Run". The minis are actually off to Italy next according to the article - due back in Eyemouth in four years time (anyone that's ever travelled in an original Mini will know that every journey feels like it's a year long - even Sir Alec Issigonis said the Mini was a "spartan mode of conveyance with everything cut to the bone").

The River Tweed Commissioners and the Tweed Foundation (The Paper Boy didn't know such bodies existed) have called upon Scottish Rural Development Minister Ross Finnie to give greater protection to wild salmon in the Tweed. The Association of Salmon Fishery Boards (ASFB) supported by all 42 fishery boards, 18 fishery trusts and 7 national management and angling associations in its opposition to the import of live salmon from Norway. For those that aren't aware Scottish and Irish Salmon fisheries and fish farms are relatively disease free - much more so than their Norwegian counterparts - ASFB et al would like to keep it that way.

"Beaches in Berwickshire are Top" screams the headline on page 2. Beaches at Pease Bay, Coldingham & St. Abbs are singled out as being the best in Berwickshire & East Lothian.

In a much more important story, it seems that the Saltires flying at the border on the A1 are attracting a lot of flak. Upsetting the English ? Nope - they're apparently not the correct shade of blue. The Paper Boy has seen Saltires in many shades from a wishy-washy blue to almost black, but apparently the Scottish Parliament decided some time ago that Pantone® Blue 300 is the correct blue for Saltires, although that decision is not compulsory because the chosen blue is lighter than the 'Unionist' version in the Union Flag of which the Saltire forms an integral part. The defence of the flags "operator" (which is ultimately the Scottish Executive - that's to say the largest party grouping within the Scottish Parliament) is that in the exposed position that they fly in the flags don't last long, are regularly changed and will be changed in due course - once they run out of stock of the wrong colour flags.

As mentioned in a previous article in the Paper Shop - The Local Berwickshire lad from London has left the Big Brother house, after deciding that it wasn't for him. Local interest is over now.

Prentice Butchers in Duns has scooped four awards at the Scottish Speciality Sausage Evaluation (you couldn't make this stuff up) held at Selkirk Rugby Club. The recipes have trounced those of 256 other entries from all over Scotland. The awards were: Gold for Pork & Black Pudding, Gold for Pork & Mango Chutney, Silver for Chicken Curry Sausage and Silver for a Wild Boar Sausage. The Paper Boy will have to investigate the claims of 50 varieties for sale at the shop in Duns and report back.

The search is on for the "Best Borderer". The competition aims to find the person who goes out of their way to be helpful, gives back to their community and is proud to be a Borderer. A monthly Best Borderer will be chosen each month from now until September when a run-off between them will decide the overall winner.

There's also a World Cup Wallchart on page 4, as long as your wall will look ok with an A4-sized chart on it.

A machine for cleaning chewing gum from the streets is pictured in use in Kelso (which is in Roxburghshire) last week. Apparently the machine hiccupped when a valve failed and stranded it. It's on a 6-month trial with SBLocal who will decide if it's worth buying one themselves after trying it out in most Border towns.

Not sure where the news element is in the next story - "SBLocal keeping busy" - apparently SBLocal squads have been doing various jobs over the last month as a result of requests from SBC members, community councils and members of the public. One would hope as a council tax payer that they "do various jobs" without being prompted if the requests dry up - that is not clear from the article, nor is it entirely clear that they worked outside the last month.

Four Berwickshire men appeared in Sheriff Kevin's court before an unnamed Sheriff on petition charged with assault. The article then goes on to name five men from Berwickshire.

On the Letters page, there is a long letter from an Eyemouth-based Professor about the impending switchover to Digital TV, in which the Professor reiterates the concerns of Michael Moore MP and the House of Commons Committee report. Estimates given for the cost of switchover by the committee are quoted as being £26 to £153 although the Sunday Times quoted as high as £955 allowing for more sophisticated services, new cabling and more electricity for more devices. He rightly points out that averages are meaningless - it doesn't matter to me that my neighbour paid £200 if I only paid £20 - A more pertinent point he makes is that as switchover gathers pace and more digital TV products are sold, the price should come down - therefore those switching over first (the Borders) will pay more for the privelidge. The Paper Boy is well aware of much of the misinformation out there and does his best to help out the confused - but sadly those that understand the issue seem to be few and far between, and the most vulnerable may fall prey to the unscrupulous.


Picture of Duns Sheriff Court courtesy of the Scottish Courts website